Christmas cards

What to write, how to address them, and thank-you notes. How much do you know?

You have a good pen and forty cards to get through. What's the part people actually keep?

One line just for them

Common practice is a short greeting and one line meant only for that person, in your own hand. Mention something you noticed about their year or something you shared, then sign off however you like. A printed card with just your name is fine too, and signing it by hand helps.

How do I sign it? Any warm closing works. When several people sign, the order doesn't matter, though adults usually go before children.

Your neighbor lost her husband this spring, and her card is next in the stack. What do you write?

Say their name, gently

Say that you are thinking of them, and write the name of the person who died. A few lines are enough, and a small memory or one specific offer of help is welcome if you have one. This is common practice among hospice and grief groups, and a few gentle lines are better than silence.

Should I still send a card? Yes. Even a short message tells them someone remembered.

You're addressing an envelope to a whole household, and you want the last name right. How does it go?

The Smiths, no apostrophe

Common practice for a family is The Smiths, or The Smith Family if you'd rather, with an s or es and no apostrophe, so The Joneses. For a couple, Mr. and Mrs. John Smith is the traditional form. For a widow, Mrs. John Smith is the traditional form if you don't know her preference, and Mrs. Mary Smith or Ms. Mary Smith is right if that's what she uses.

What if she kept her own last name? Write both in full, on one line if they fit: Mr. John Smith and Ms. Mary Jones. Either name can go first.

You have a pile of new presents and a box of note cards. When is a thank-you note due?

Within a week or two

There's no rule, but common practice is to write as soon as you can, ideally within a week or two of Christmas. A note is still worth sending after that. If you opened the gift in front of the giver and thanked them then, a note isn't needed, and if the giver wasn't there, a handwritten note is the preferred way to thank them.

Is a text or a call enough? Between peers it can be, as long as it sounds like you mean it.

You've written up the family's year, and it runs to three pages. What should you do?

You're behind, and most of your list is in your phone. What's the common view on sending your card by text or email?

Yes, but not to everyone

Common practice now accepts it for casual friends and for relatives who use email or text, as long as you write it the way you would a paper card. Paper is still the traditional choice, so mail a real card to anyone who would rather have one. For someone grieving, write a real note.

Can I send one email to my whole list? You can, but use Bcc so nobody's address shows, and keep the attachment small.

Next: Watching Christmas movies